Best Safe Snow Activities

by Wanda on January 25, 2013

The family was invited on a ski trip for this weekend by some of my husband’s friends. We’ve been on a few of these trips before. Each time we had fun, at some point. The time I didn’t have fun was in the actual skiing part. I hate skiing. It’s cold, it’s painful, and it requires coordination that I don’t have. This year I’m going to put my foot down. I’m still going. But I’ll be having fun in the snow that doesn’t involve me renting expensive equipment and falling down a million times. Here are plenty of ways to enjoy the snow for those who are extreme sport-challenged.

1. Tubing/Sledding. Fun, easy, safe[r]. The kids can do it together without you having to worry about them getting lost in the snow.

2. Snowbuilding. I’m lumping snowmen, snow angels, and all snow structures into one activity.

3. Snow Cones. All you need is some clean snow and some sort of syrup. The flavor combinations are endless. Just remember to avoid the lemon snow cones.

4. Snow Ball fights. I don’t promote violence, but fighting is ok when it involves snow, pillows, or tickles.

5. Stay inside with hot cocoa

Ok, ok, it’s not really a snow activity, but this is my favorite part of ski trips and snow. After you come in from the cold, nothing feels better than curling up in a comfy couch with a warm drink, blanket and kids.

I feel like I post pictures of cocoa a lot haha

Who Should Pay?

by Wanda on January 23, 2013

My little brother, (the only who is a bit of a man-child), is young, good-looking, and an active dater. He often tells me about the different dates he goes on here and there. Usually they are funny, interesting stories, which my other sibling, my husband, and even myself like to live vicariously through. Recently he brought up a story that brought up a fun discussion.

He was out on a third date at a fancy cash only tapas restaurant. He underestimated the bill and didn’t have enough cash to cover the tip as well. They had been out twice before, and he paid both times. This time he asked her to cover the tip. She didn’t have a single dollar in her purse. That made him fuming mad. It wasn’t that he had to go to the ATM. It was that she wasn’t be prepared to pay anything at all. To him, that meant she was leaching off of him.

“She should at least offer,” my brother said, “that’s just polite.”

Thus led to a fun family discussion amongst all the older and married family members on etiquette in dating. Some said that the man paying is chivalry. Others said that in the modern world, women are social equals, so they should pay for themselves. Other’s said she should have given herself the option to pay for herself. I’m not sure how I feel about it myself. My husband always paid for me when were dating, but that was some time ago. I can see my brother’s qualm with the issue.

What do you guys think? Who should pay on a date?

How Train Your Friends and Family

by Wanda on January 21, 2013

I love my friends. We’re a tight knit group that has been together for years. Our kids are about the same age. Three of us were actually pregnant at the same time. They are always there for me when I need them in good times and bad. But sometimes in those medium times, it gets to be much. I mean, when your personal life gets busy, it’s kind of hard to keep track of everyone else’s. Of course, when you don’t, you end up upsetting your friends.

My husband doesn’t have that problem. Of course not. He’s a man. Men don’t feel the obligation. My husband has his close set of friends, but when they don’t feel like talking, they don’t. My husband always laughs at me when I spend more time thinking about my friends’ doings than I do about my own. He says the only reason why women end up getting overly caught up in their social lives is because they set up the expectation of always being available. (Then he’ll say something insensitive and we’ll get into a feminist-chauvinist argument which is nothing if not amusing at this point in our marriage, but I digress.)

“If I’m on time today, they’ll expect me to by on time every day”

I realized he does have a point (not a very big point, but still a point.) I have to respond to every text message in timely fashion because that is the expectation between my friends and I. My husband can go months without talking to his friends because they have “trained” each other to not expect regular communication. Granted, their one-track brains probably can’t handle as much communication, but there is still value in it.

There was a Malcolm in the Middle episode many years ago where the delinquent son Reese chose to be late for the first day of school because “If I’m on time on day one, they’ll expect me to be on time every day.” This concept can be translated to your kids, family, relationship, or even work. You train people on their expectations of you every time you do something. I’m not saying you have people lower your standards, but not being miss perfect all the time can make life easier for you.

Vacuuming, Working Out, and the Importance of Results

by Wanda on January 18, 2013

Growing up, the chore I hated most was vacuuming. It wasn’t the manual labor. As a little kid, I liked any opportunity to “be a grown up.” It was the fact that there was no visible result from all that work. It never made sense to me why we should spend all those minutes moving a loud, heavy piece of machinery over our carpets when it didn’t seem to do anything. When I asked “why?” my dear old dad gave me an extra long explanation about dust mites and “dirt you can’t see.” (He has a habit of long drawn out explanations, even to his grandkids).

Nowadays whenever I want my kids to do something, I always make sure to offer a good reason why. It helps them think for themselves and self-motivate, instead of mindlessly following instructions. That doesn’t mean they are happy to do chores or homework, but that certainly takes the fight out of it. The one person I didn’t to use this technique on was myself.

We’re two weeks into the new year. I like to make fun of all the people who resolve to be in the gym January 2nd and quit by January 4th. I can make fun of them because unlike the rest, I started my gym routine on a day other than January 1st. However, despite being inspired by my sister-in-law’s primal physique, I slacked quite a bit during the holidays.

It wasn’t a lack of discipline, as much as I felt I has been “good” about my gym schedule for awhile and felt I could get away with a bit of cheating. I mean, it’s not like one workout will show a difference. Of course, if you maintain this attitude for too long, and the results will be apparent. They will be as apparent as a carpet that hasn’t been vacuumed for months.

The lesson here is that I stopped reminding myself of the results. Yes, vacuuming and working out doesn’t have immediately changes to see. One must remind oneself of the long term effects of the activity. That’s how you can inspire yourself to keep pressing. Vacuum those carpets. Hit that gym. Goodbye.

Why do we say “Bless You”?

by Wanda on January 16, 2013

The lovely lady to my left is very sneezy today. Here at MSD, the entire office is in a circular formation, so ay sneeze is audible to everyone. When someones sneezes multiple times in a group setting there is a typical pattern:

First sneeze: The closest co-workers (in terms of both proximity and friendship) say “bless you.’

Second sneeze: The rest of the office says “bless you.”

Third sneeze: The blessers of the first two may say it again. The people who wait till all the sneezing to finish finally give their blessing.

Fourth sneeze: Come on now. Most will probably pretend they didn’t hear it. Someone may say “BLESS you” in a funny/sarcastic way.

Fifth sneeze: Now this is just ridiculous. At this point the sneezer should just apologize lol.

Why do we say “bless you” anyway?

Milhouse from the Simpsons said “When you sneeze, that’s your soul trying to escape. Saying ‘God bless you’ crams it back in!” That’s not too far off. The earliest usage of the phrase came from the time of Pope Gregory the Great. At that time, a sneeze was a possible sign of contracting the bubonic plague. A sneezer should be blessed hopefully avoid the plague.

But condolences have been given to sneezers prior to that. The ancient Romans would say “Salve,” or “Jupiter preserve you.” In Arabic it’s “Alhamdulillah,” “praise be to god.” In Russia they say, “bud zdorov,” “be healthy.”

Gesundheits and the like all seem to stem from the fact that ancient people weren’t totally sure what a sneeze’s purpose was, but all seemed to agree it was something bad. Nowadays we may look at a sneeze as nothing to concern ourselves with, however prior to modern medicine, it wasn’t uncommon for people to die from minor illnesses. At one point, a sneeze was a huge cause for concern. Now we know that sneezing is the body’s way of expelling a toxin or germs. Since this is healthy, we should probably change “bless you” to “congratulations.”

Anyhow, I guess I’ll keep saying “bless you” till she stops sneezing. Not because she needs to be blessed, but because my other co-workers are tired of acknowledging the sneeze, and someone probably should.

Coffee Alternatives to get your day started

by Wanda on January 14, 2013

I am very caffeine sensitive. A cup of coffee usually gets me agitated, followed by a crash, and headache. However, on these tough Monday mornings, sometimes one really needs a jolt. Here are some alternatives to coffee that can help you wakey-wakey in the morning.

1 Green Tea. The caffeine in tea is minimal. Aside from boosting energy, it also has a plethora of other health benefits.

2. Brief Exposure to Cold. A few seconds of cold water at the end of your morning shower can spark some adrenaline to get your up and about.

3. Nuts. Nuts have healthy fats that induce metabolism and a steady flow of energy.

4. Hot Chocolate. Can stimulate similarly to coffee. Besides, who needs an excuse to down more chocolate?

5. Wheat Grass Juice. Full of the right vitamins and minerals to help you produce natural energy.

6. Light morning exercise. Light calisthenics will get the blood pumping. No one has ever fallen asleep during Pilates. The key is to not exert yourself which will cause a crash later.

7. Read something interesting. Ok this is not something I do. My husband works an odd schedule and often wakes up way before he has to. He’ll lay in bed and read a fun book on his Kindle. He says that being awake while lying down eases him into the waking day.

8. Schedule some exciting activities. Its hard to wake up for work. It’s easy to get up for home-made waffles. Make sure the first thing you do each day is fun. If you are getting tired at work. Schedule something fun for lunchtime or right after work, so you can stay excited in anticipation the whole time.

Lunch is in a few hours. Any ideas?

The Corduroy Appreciation Club

by Wanda on January 11, 2013

Today is January 11. 1/11 in numerical form. Along with November 11th, and many of the days in 2011, it’s a special day for some. There is one group in New York City (and possibly the world) that hold’s theses ’1′ filled days in high esteem. That is The Corduroy Appreciation Club.

Yes, that’s a real thing. I’m very serious. It’s a group of corduroy enthusiasts with a great sense of humor that convenes on days with lots of ’1′s in it. This is because 1′s side by side mimic the ridges in the fabric, known as “wales.” How do I know this? I was, and probably still am, a member.

Prior to the special year of 2011, their previous big year was 2001. On 11/11/01 I happened to be a single twenty-something who had just moved to New York a month ago and didn’t know a soul outside of work. I heard about “The Corduroy Appreciation Club” on a radio show and saw they were convening near my apartment on the West Side. I had to check it out. I borrowed a corduroy blazer from my then roommate and went to the bar party put on by the CAC.

I want cord pants like these next CAC holiday!

Just as one would expect, it was a horde of very funny, very artsy folk all donning various corduroy attire: vests, slacks, hats, even capes, yes, capes. The organizer gave a funny pithy speech about the grandeur of the fabric then led this group of maybe fifty people to 41st to pay respects to the Whaling Wall– a mural of giant humpback whale. Wale/whale, get it? The corny joke ay have been taken a bit too far when they took out a bag of ruffled potato chips and laid them out as tribute to the wall. (Apparently the ridges in chips are also called “wales.”) Another speech was made where instructions were given to “Hail the Wale.” After this sacrifice, we all went to bar and had a grand old time.

It was a silly night for sure. Although that was my only experience with the Corduroy Club, I hold that night special in my heart. Though I didn’t want to admit it at the time, I was a lonely girl in a big city. That night I met an awesome chick whose been my best friend for over a decade now and is the godmother of my daughter.

So if you see someone in corduroy today, don’t think it’s a coincidence. In fact, chances are you can start an easy conversation. Just “Hail the Wale.”

Connecting the Dots Looking Forward

by Wanda on January 9, 2013

My younger cousin visited last weekend, and one thing we started talking about was the new year. She just graduated from college last May and hasn’t found a full-time job yet. Her mom (my aunt,) has been on her case about it as any mother would, and its been a huge point of contention. My cousin isn’t dumb, and she isn’t lazy. She just hasn’t found her calling. Being that I’m between the ages of cousin and aunt and therefore can represent both parent and child, I felt the need to step in.

When I was a wandering youth in my early twenties, my mother and I would often fight on what I should do with my life. By the time I was twenty-four, I had changed careers four times. (That’s about twice a year since I graduated at twenty-two.) Each week I had a new idea of what I wanted to do with my life. From her perspective, I seemed to be lost in the sauce.

Thanks to Froot Loops, I found my guiding force in life.

But I didn’t think so. I didn’t have a career yet, nor did I know what I wanted to do long term. I was bouncing from activity to activity. My motto was to follow my nose to wherever it goes. (Thanks Toucan Sam.) I didn’t know where I was going. I didn’t have a detailed plan. All I knew was that as long as I did what felt right, I’d find myself in a happy place.

I can’t really tell my mom and aunt “I told you so,” because I didn’t know what to tell them at the time. But the end results are favorable. I have a happy family, happy career, and happy life full of laughter and love. I may never have found my place, had I tried to plan every step of the way. I can look back at all the fortuitous events that had to happen for me to meet my husband, get hired by my employer, and or find the great house that I live in.

I told my cousin what I think all twenty-somethings should know, which is that life is unpredictable and spontaneous. Don’t get caught up with a five year plan or detailed life strategy. Most “responsible adults” with fiver year plans often end up hating the last four of them.

This is something I feel very strongly about. At the risk of coming off as cliche, I must share this Steve Jobs quotes which has been vastly over used since his death. There is no better string of words to express this.

[Y]ou can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life

To all the young people, older people, geriatrics, kids, may you have a wonderfully prosperous 2013 full of joy and spontaneity. Keep following your gut, and you will find your best way. Or as Mr. Jobs would say, “Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.”

The Importance of being earnest

by Wanda on January 7, 2013

I hope you all had a lovely weekend. I certainly did. The hubs and I brought the kids to the Museum of Natural History. As a family of nerds we had plenty to look at. The hubs took our sons to see the dinosaurs first. I took my daughter to the underwater exhibits. My kids are a curious crew of critters. No car ride, or trip to anywhere is complete without a barrage of questions for their father and me.

Underwater life is definitely not something I know much about. In fact, deep sea creatures kind of give me the creeps. My daughter of course proceeded to ask me questions about this and that, like “how jellyfish breathe?” and “can electric eels power lightbulbs?” I did my best to answer the questions I didn’t know by reading the information provided by the museum. But for many of her questions, I simply had to say “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know a lot of things, Mom” was her response.

Hearing that from a five year old hurt. It really stung. Obviously she is too young to understand that every grown-up can’t possibly know everything about everything, especially aquatic life. Who does she think I am? A marine biologist? Still, the desire to appear all knowing to one’s children is a strong one. My mother always tried to keep up that appearance. Whenever my siblings or I would ask her a difficult question that she didn’t know, especially the science-related ones, She would simple make up and answer. This was fine kept us under control till we became teenagers and realized that Mom was wrong about a lot. I believe this is the cause of the contention between parents and teenagers.

I’m no parenting expert, and my oldest is only nine, but I believe the problems with teenagers comes from the fact that most kids think their parents are omniscient and perfect on every level. Once a kid reaches middle school-age, he or she realizes that parents aren’t perfect and maybe they are wrong on a lot. I know in my case, when I realized all the little white lies I was told growing up, I started to mistrust everything Mom said.

Before we left the museum, I came up with an obvious solution. I told my daughter,

“You know all those questions I wasn’t able to answer? We’re going to look the answers when we get home.”

(Don’t worry, I’m didn’t show her how to Google–not that she won’t figure it out on her own soon.) Problem solved. More important than her thinking I have the answers, is to show her how to get the answers. Although my little girl no longer thinks I’m a super-genius, at least she knows I’m sincere. Hopefully my theory will prove right when she turns thirteen.

The Curious Thing About Fridays

by Wanda on January 4, 2013

Happy Friday everyone!

Today is an slightly different feeling Friday. I’m sure most of you all had off earlier in the week with New Years. That probably made this entire three day week free fairly easy. But Friday is still Friday, the most enjoyable day of the work week. Why is that? Friday is still a full eight hour day. Why should an individual isolated day of the week become easier or harder because of the days around it?

The reason is that us silly humans are slaves to perception. Most of us have trouble waking up to go to work or to do chores. I’m sure most of you all hit the snooze button a few times on most days. However, I’ve never heard of anyone hitting the snooze button to go to the beach or the amusement park, no matter how early the rising time. The only difference is our anticipation of future events.

How does this anticipation affect our lives? Tuesday and Wednesday are known as the most productive work days. Mondays are slow because we’re coming off the weekend. Thursdays and Fridays are slow because most people are already focused on the weekend. In a way we lose out on productivity three out of five days per week. For what gain? Does thinking about the weekend help us enjoy the weekend more? Probably not. If anything, we may enjoy our weekend less when it doesn’t turn out to be as fun as we had hoped.

Zig Ziglar said that most people think about play while they’re at work, and think about work when they’re at play, so all day regardless of what they are doing, they are never really at work nor play. Instead they waste their entire day. I couldn’t agree more. Today I’m going to continue pretending it’s Tuesday. Then when this Tuesday is done, I’ll go straight to fully enjoying my Saturday. Thank you very much.

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