For the past seven years, Valentine’s Day has been more about the kids than about hubby and I. Who am I kidding? For the past seven years, everything has been more about kids than hubby and I. The Valentine’s Day when I was pregnant with my first child, I remember wondering if it was going to be the last truly romantic Valentine’s Day of my marriage. I feared of what having a family would do to our romance. I daydreamed about having to make Valentine’s Day of the following year an important renewal of passion. What a silly idea that was!
Valentine’s Day is fun and a lovely thing to celebrate, but it shouldn’t be that big a deal. (I know all my ex-boyfriends would slap their palms to their foreheads if they heard me say that now.) As long as romance is continuously renewed throughout the year, who cares if we can’t do a fancy dinner on a random Thursday? Here are three tips for new parents to keep their fire burning.
- Monthly Date Night. It started as weekly date night…for about a week. Now with three kids and a series of obligations, it’s kind of hard to keep up with it more than once per month. It’s actually a good thing. It gives us 30 days of anticipation for the next one. Also we also don’t feel as guilty spending a little extra for whatever romantic adventure we choose.
- Take classes together. Your spouse is more than a lover, he/she is your life partner. There is no better way to learn and expand your life than with someone you love. There is no better activity to share with someone you love, than learning and expanding your life together. Some great examples are dance classes, cooking classes, and maybe even something he likes
- Soulful Eye Contact EVERY DAY. I learned this one from an acting class a long time ago. I ran it by my married friends, and I couldn’t believe how rarely they looked deeply into their spouses eyes. It may seems like a silly ritual, but the eyes are the window to the soul. Maybe you and your spouse don’t have the time or desire to hang out all evening, that’s ok. In just a minute of deep eye contact you can reconnect and get on the same page as your partner.
